Is it normal for my toddler to still wake at night?

At some point many parents wonder if it’s still normal for their child to wake at night and need them. I hear many parents of toddlers frustrated and concerned that their toddler is still waking. So many parents expect wake ups in the first year but are unprepared for them to continue into the toddler years.

Having a realistic understanding of toddler sleep is just as important as understanding baby sleep norms. Toddlers are complex and dynamic, and their sleep can mirror the ups and downs of their development. It’s normal for toddlers to wake at night.

Toddler SleepGuest UserFebruary 14, 2021toddler sleep, toddler sleep questions, toddler wakings, toddler wakes at nightComment

Nighttime Parenting Affirmations

What to tell yourself when you are struggling

Nighttime parenting is hard work. It’s helpful to have some tools to support yourself when your doubting your parenting choices or up in the middle of the night and feeling completely done.

Here are a few tools centering around how we talk to ourselves about nighttime parenting with some specific affirmations and reframing ideas.

Should I put my baby down drowsy but awake?

Put your baby down drowsy but awake is a common piece of sleep advice, but is it really something you need to do? Many parents are warned against soothing their baby to sleep in favor of teaching them to fall asleep independently. The problem is that babies don’t often cooperate, especially very young babies, and many parents’ struggle. Everyone says it’s an essential skill in forming healthy sleep habits, so when baby won’t cooperate, it’s easy to feel like a failure.

The Facts behind Babies and Self-Soothing

So many of my clients have heard comments like these on a regular basis. It makes them feel alone, isolated, and even doubt themselves.

So do I really need to teach my baby to self-soothe?

The good news is that you do not need to leave your baby to cry to teach them anything! And in fact, leaving a baby to cry is the exact opposite of how you help them calm down.

Though advice to leave a baby to cry to teach self-soothing is common, It’s incredibly outdated. So much sleep and parenting advice misses the very real neuroscience that disproves this concept as well as the important role of responsiveness in development.

My Toddler Won't Nap

The other day I was talking with a client about how hard it is when your little fights naps! It reminded me of my own struggles with a toddler who won’t nap. My daughter was fighting her nap so hard, even though she was tired. This wasn’t the first or last time she refused a much-needed nap, and every time the struggle is real!

A Client Story: Moving Away from Rocking to Sleep

I’m going to do something a bit different in this post and share a client story through my own words and my clients.

When E reached out to me, she was tired, anxious, and at a loss for how to improve their sleep situation. Her 2-year-old daughter, S, needed to be both bounced and rocked to sleep, and it had become physically exhausting, stressful, and unsustainable.

Kimberly HawleyDecember 20, 2020Comment

What Does Gentle Mean?

The word gentle is popping up everywhere! So many professionals are using gentle to describe what they do. It’s become a marketing buzz word, and the more it’s used, the less clear it is what gentle actually means.

Standard time is coming! How to support sleep through the time change

Are you ready for the time change?

I’ll be honest, I completely forgot about it until last week. It snuck up on me. This year it’s November 1st so we get Halloween and a time change all in one weekend!

Coffee, Podcasts, and Family Walks – Pandemic Life Family Rituals!

Routines and rituals are an essential part of family life. They create predictability and security. They provide comfort and connection. They give us familiar structure for our days, for our transitions.

With so much uncertainty and upended routines, finding family rituals and routines to anchor and connect you during these times is a powerful tool.

EncouragementKimberly HawleyJuly 29, 2020family routines, self care, pandemic parentingComment

Is Bedsharing Safe?

I hear so many parents confused and conflicted about bedsharing. Is it safe? Is it ok to do?

Let’s go through some of the recommendations and things you may want to consider.

Kimberly HawleyJuly 11, 2020Comment

Small sleep shifts in challenging times

What happens when you are too tired, drained, and burnt out to work on sleep? When you are too exhausted to give any energy to improving sleep? When you can’t see where your next opening will come to improve things, so you just keep your head down and keep going…

Kimberly HawleyJune 21, 2020Comment

Bedtime battles and fighting sleep: what to do when bedtime is a struggle

Bedtime is hard. Most of us aren’t at our best at the end of the day. You are tired, probably still have a million things you want to do, and just want some personal space. Your child is tired, maybe overstimulated, and wants nothing more than to stay close to you. Or perhaps you have a child with a major case of FOMO, fear of missing out!

Kimberly HawleyMay 25, 2020Comment

When will my baby sleep through the night?

So many parents start asking “When will my baby sleep through the night” early on in their child’s life. Our culture places a strong emphasis on babies sleeping through the night. This view shapes new parent’s focus and expectations. From friends to family to pediatricians the questions and messages are the same. It is your responsibility to get your baby sleeping through the night as soon as you can. If your baby doesn’t sleep for long stretches, then you are doing something wrong, hurting their development, and undermining their ability to sleep forever!

How to support baby, toddler, and parent sleep during social distancing

Supporting sleep with littles in the family is hard, even at the best of times. These are not the best of times. Your whole routine has likely been thrown out.

Kimberly HawleyApril 5, 2020Comment

Parenting Baby to Sleep and The Sleep Toolbox

So often nighttime parenting tends to fall on one parent, particularly in nursing families. The nursing parent takes sole responsibility for nighttime parenting because nursing is such an effective way to get baby to sleep. If this works for your family, there is no need to change anything.

Kimberly HawleyJune 22, 2017Comment

What is infant sleep education?

I’m very excited to have expanded my business with a new service, Infant Sleep Education. With so many different approaches to sleep, I feel that it’s important to share a little bit about what Infant Sleep Education is and isn’t. I hope you will find this Q & A helpful for learning more about this great approach to sleep.

Kimberly HawleyApril 8, 2017Comment

DC Birth Business Conversations: Metropolitan Doulas

I’m excited to share the next post in my series on great people and businesses working with pregnant and new parents in the DC area. I’d like to introduce you all to Nikki Wray, Co-Founder of Metropolitan Doulas. It’s been wonderful to hear more about her story, and pick her brain on some tips for postpartum families. Nikki’s love of her work and supporting parents is one of the things that really shines through when you talk to her, and I hope this interview lets you see that.

Kimberly HawleyMarch 7, 2017Comment

DC Birth Business Conversations: My Orange Wellness

I’m so excited to be starting a new, on-going blog series about the amazing people serving pregnant and new parents in the DC area. In this first post, you will hear from Tracie, a massage therapist in Capitol Hill and owner of My Orange Wellness.

Kimberly HawleyFebruary 21, 2017My Orange WellnessComment

Five reasons you should take a breastfeeding class while pregnant

Breastfeeding is natural. You are busy. There are so many things to do to prepare for birth and the arrival of your baby. Adding one more thing to your crazy schedule seems laughable. What is there to learn anyway?

So why should you make time for a prenatal breastfeeding class? Here are 5 reasons.

Kimberly HawleyJanuary 18, 2017Nusing, BreastfeedingComment

How to handle those end of pregnancy questions….

The end of pregnancy can be a challenging time, both physically and emotionally. You are most likely feeling uncomfortable, a bit anxious about when baby will come, and probably very ready to be done being pregnant. If you are anything like me, people’s comments, even when you know they come from a place of support and excitement, can easily irritate you. Here are a few of the most common end of pregnancy questions and some thoughts on how to handle them.

Kimberly HawleyJuly 19, 2016Comment

Helpful Resources

What to tell yourself when you are struggling

So do I really need to teach my baby to self-soothe?