Infant and Toddler Nap Solutions
Naps. Something all parents want and some babies fight! Naps are an area that confuse and frustrate so many parents I talk with. There’s so much misinformation out there, some of which really undermines finding a nap rhythm that works for your family. Below are some of the most common questions I get from parents in my sleep classes and coaching support. I hope you find them helpful.
Your top nap questions, answered!
Are short naps bad for my baby?
Short naps have a bad reputation, but they shouldn’t. Many babies only need short naps and wake rested. They are getting the sleep they need. Not all babies need long naps. If that’s your baby, you are doing great!
If they regularly wake cranky and tired from short naps, it’s time for some adjustments. That may mean adjusting the timing or how you are supporting the nap. Some babies will only nap longer with contact and independent naps will be much shorter.
Often naps lengthen as babies nap fewer times a day, but that’s not a guarantee.
Can a nap be too long?
I know the saying never wake a sleeping baby is popular, but it’s not always helpful. Given the right environment, some babies will nap longer than is helpful for their sleep over the whole 24 hours. This can be especially true if they are napping in the dark. You may decide a nap is too long if later naps in the day are very short or often skipped, the long nap lasts later into the evening than works for your regular bedtime, or if you suspect your little might be getting too much daytime sleep.
Should my baby nap in the dark?
My general answer is no. Naps should be in normal daytime light. Be mindful of not having bright sunlight in their eyes, but it shouldn’t be trying to replicate nighttime. And yes, I know this goes against a lot of popular advice. Darkness is helpful overnight to support the release of sleep hormones. That’s not what we are trying to do with naps. Long naps in the dark can undermine the circadian rhythm. This is particularly important in the first 3-4 months when the circadian rhythm is developing, but it’s still important as babies and toddlers grow. If your little gets distracted falling asleep in the light, you can darken the room and bring back in some light after they are asleep.
Do they always have to nap in the same environment?
No! It’s ok for your baby or toddler to nap in some different environments. In fact, having some napping flexibility is really helpful.
Do they have to nap in their crib or is it ok to do a contact nap, babywearing nap, or stroller nap?
There is nothing magical about crib naps. Babies have been napping on the go while parents did life throughout human history. A baby napping in your arms, while being worn, or in their stroller is getting good, quality sleep. There’s nothing wrong with crib naps if they work for your family. They just aren’t the only healthy place to nap.
Is more daytime sleep always better?
No. Your aby or toddler only needs so much sleep in 24 hours. Sometimes more daytime sleep means less or more disrupted sleep. It’s about finding the balance that works for them.
What about awake windows?
While awake windows are a common piece of sleep advice, they are actually not evidence based. They are loosely a concept describing how quickly your child builds up sleep pressure, but there’s a lot of variation in how quickly babies and toddlers build up enough sleep pressure to need to nap. Using your child’s cues to time naps will help you set up a nap routine individualized to their needs. Some children can be difficult to read, and fight naps more than others. Typical awake windows can be a helpful guide if you are struggling to spread naps well throughout the day. Use them as a starting point and adjust accordingly. They are not a precise schedule you must follow.
Do I need a pre-nap routine?
Some parents find a short, pre-nap routine to be helpful. The goal here is to provide some space to transition from play to a more relaxed, calm state for sleep. Keep it simple – this doesn’t need to be as long as your bedtime routine. And if you are out and about, don’t worry about it.
What happens when my baby fights a nap?
Fighting a nap can be due to so many things. If it’s happening regularly, consider adjusting timings, increasing activity, or finding better ways to settle down for the nap. If your little is still fighting sleep after 15-20 minutes and clearly not settling down, stop and take a break. Go play some where else for a while until they are showing signs of calming down and then try again. Struggling for a nap for a long period of time frustrates everyone and that is not helpful.
You can read about my daughter fighting a nap here: https://intuitiveparentingdc.com/blog/my-toddler-wont-nap
How do I know if it’s time to drop a nap?
Nap transitions can be tricky times. Often your child is ready to drop a nap before they are quite ready to do without the nap. Before dropping a nap try shortening it or adjusting the timing. Your child may need less sleep at that time or need more awake time and activity before they are tired. If you regularly struggle with a nap even under ideal conditions, the nap is very short, or your child gets less sleep over-all with the nap than without the nap, it may be time to drop that nap. Expect a few weeks of back and forth between nap rhythms and some tricky bedtimes as they adjust.
I hope these questions help you make sense out of your nap struggles. If you need more support, reach out and let’s talk about working together.